How it started versus how it's going...

How it started versus how it’s going…

If I give you that prompt, you’re supposed to show me how you’re smashing it. Or how you started off cute, and you’re just getting cuter. Maybe it’s your house renovation and how what started as a shell is now a desirable, instagramable abode. 

But the thing is, the journey is not linear and you’re not supposed to stay the same. Nothing is. Even great, granite statues are weatherer by time and pooped on. There is no straight line that leads you from A to B. You will most likely go from A to P and then back to C before leapfrogging to T missing out Q,R and S entirely. Or perhaps you’ll start at Z or B. The thing is that life is not linear, and neither are you. The trajectory will, and will always, change.

I know the #howitstartedhowitsgoing challenge is supposed to be fun, and actually it really is. It’s a great way to show how far you’ve come, or what you’ve achieved or how you’ve turned things around for yourself, but it’s also a ready-made way to compare yourself and feel less, because what it doesn’t show is the hard work it’s taken to get to where that person is, or the sacrifices, or the make up…

Let’s face it, the carefully curated world of social media isn’t going to give you a warm, fuzzy glow when it appears that everyone else is doing better than you. It’s going to make you feel ‘less than’. But the thing is, if you use it for yourself, without the need for comparison, it can be quite powerful. All too often we forget what we’ve achieved, the hurdles we’ve jumped, the hills we’ve climbed, the battles we’ve fought and won. 

You are remarkable. The fact that you are here at all says incredible things about you. Every flaw, every challenge, every heartbreak, every tense moment, argument and falling out you have got over has all contributed to where you are now. And when you approach it from that point of view the ‘how it started and what i’ve overcome to get to how it’s going now before it moves on to something else’ is a good reminder of exactly that.

There is no ‘end point’. We are not designed in a way that easily allows us to say, “Great. I’ve got it! Everything I ever wanted.”, it just doesn’t work that way. Life changes and we change and in doing so our ambitions, dreams and goals shift too. The fluidity in accepting that and knowing that we are forever changing allows us to bring a gentleness, curiosity and a sense of being in the present rather than forever looking forward or backward.

This doesn’t stop us from having ambition, drive, dreams and goals. It doesn’t stop us from creating a blueprint to connect us with our joy and energy. It just means that when there are bumps in the road, or when we need to take a diversion, we do so with the full acceptance that it might lead us somewhere more interesting.

So, how it started… pretty awesome; how it’s going…even better. Maybe Lizzo says it best:

“Oh I’m not the girl I was or used to be.

Bitch, I might be better…”

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